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Care, Trust, and World Peace

  • Aug. 7th, 2008 at 3:39 AM
Falcon in the City

 When you start caring about someone, it changes the whole dynamic of not just your relationship with them, but your relationship with yourself.

Let's break this down a bit. Say you care about someone. You care that they make it home safe. You care that they had a good day. You care that they smile.

You care about what they have to say. You care about their opinions. And here is the most important one - you care about their opinion of you.

Now it's interesting to note that as a child, you are taught not to care what others think of you - to do as you please, and to please yourself.

Yet that is the inverse of what happens when you care about someone else. So if we are taught to not care what others think of us, then aren't we being taught not to care about others?

You could say that is extreme - but let me assure you it is not as black and white as it may appear. Some people care more about people than others. Those that care the least about another's opinion of them, tend to care the least about people in general.

This isn't to say one overall careless person could not open their heart to a few individuals, but it would surely be more difficult than for someone more caring.

Of course, caring isn't the only factor - trust plays a very large role. In order to care about someone's opinion, you must first trust that person's judgment and ability to form a sound opinion.

An example. I was the little girl that "cared too much" about what others thought of me. I was also the one to walk up to a stranger and open a conversation. Inherently, I was very trusting and caring.

Einstein once said, "the most important question for man to answer is 'is the universe a friendly place?'" - I believe he is right.

When you believe the universe is a friendly place, you openly trust - and when you openly trust, you openly care. And that is perhaps what needs to happen in order for world peace to ever become more than an hopeless ideal.

So teach your children to care about others' opinions. Maybe then they can realize the peaceful happy world we've always wanted for our future generations.

Brainwashing
Aim Clear Blog has a post on writing outside of the first person and externalizing credit while internalizing fault as a means of being highly successful.
Truly great leaders (level 5) share a number of mostly-common traits. One of them is crediting others (looking out the window) for success and taking responsibility (looking in the mirror) for failures. External factors contributing to success could include luck, excellent team members, & market trends.

Failure often stems from lack of a coherent game plan, inviting the wrong team members onto the bus, & not facing brutal truths. Tactic or trap, writing from the self-center person can be an intentional grammatical style book decision.
The entry goes on to detail when you should and should not speak in the first person, with an aim of eliminating all self-references. While this is a good idea in theory, there are two small problems with that, as I noted in my comment.

The only downside to this technique is the propensity to write in a passive voice and come off as factual where the information is actually pure opinion. Your average reader would not be able to pick up on the fact what you have written (in this post most especially) is not to be taken as gospel, because you have successfully sold opinion as fact - to the average reader.

The critical thinker however, will notice that you have only referenced one other person, but not as a resource. You are not quoting studies or linking to references - which points to the idea you have not come to these conclusions via externalized research.

This technique, in essence, is a different form of propaganda, stemming from the magic words of marketing.

Whether you consider this to be a bad or good thing all depends on what you wish to do with this blog. Far be it for me to say the way you write is wrong - perhaps a bit deceptive, but given your demographic I’m sure they can understand your intentions and come to the same conclusions I did. =)

Notes: I originally referenced the 13 magic words of marketing in a People Watching blog post (send a request to mayobrains at gmail dot com if you do not have access and I'll consider emailing the text to you), and of course propaganda has been on my mind thanks to Maki at DoshDosh.

However, that is not my only concern with the concepts presented in the Aim Clear post. Honestly, the idea of externalizing credit while internalizing fault sounds like so much communism to me - great in theory, but not very effective in practice for a long period of time.

While it's great for improving your image with others temporarily, eventually this will shatter your internal image... and when the inside has grown dull, the outside can no longer shine genuinely. This concept is presented in my Uniform Social Standards theory.

So what is the best solution? Honesty. True, open, honesty. If you think something to be so, then say you think it. If you think you know something to be so, then reference your sources. And when it comes down to who gets the credit - dig down to the root, and find the most true reason for success and failure.

 

Falcon Lost in Thought
Theory of Uniform Social Standards

The Theory of Uniform Social Standards is based on the concept that all actions are linked. For instance, telling a lie to someone or oneself, no matter how small, eventually snowballs into a much grander lie if left unchecked. Therefore, one lie makes a person more prone to tell and see more lies, and thus makes the person less than trustworthy and trusting.

In addition, this lie affects other thought processes. As the person tells more lies, they eventually lose faith in themselves, sacrificing self-esteem and confidence. Goal setting and drive is inhibited as well, since the person cannot believe their own statements of determination wholeheartedly and do not believe in their "right" to have what they want.

Furthermore, the liar cannot believe that anyone else is telling the truth. They will not accept compliments with grace, they will doubt everyone's merit, and they will cling to what they have in life, no matter how meager or awful, because they cannot believe there is something better, that they deserve it, or that they can even attain it.

Essentially, when a person believes it is okay to tell a lie, they will go on to surmise that all things are facades and all people believe it is okay to lie as well. This is because of humanity's desire and method of relating to others - the "I'm like you so I like you" propensity. As you might imagine, this creates an interesting paradox.

Scientific Roots

This concept falls back on the premise that the brain can only imagine reality according to its learned rules of physics. As an example, although it is theoretically possible to pass one's hand through a table because it is nothing more than a cluster of electrons, the brain cannot believe it is possible because you have never tried, and therefore it will not happen. The brain then goes on to surmise that all things appearing solid must therefore be impassible.

(However, with enough training, it is possible to make your brain believe your hand can pass through the table. Asian martial artists and monks have gotten the closest to attaining this level of personal mind control. Although they have yet to do it without harming the table, they can do it without harming their hand or even feeling it.)

Your statements and actions eventually teach your brain the rules. Vibrations from the spoken word resonate in your mind, leaving an impression. Your fingers and facial expressions take the most focus from the brain, and leave an impression. Continued repetition of certain behaviors - even handwriting style - teach the brain a specific pattern, and that pattern is then applied to everything it does. A filter, if you will.

This is because of the way your brain prefers to "keep in stock" what is most used. The more you feed your brain sadness, the more your brain will produce receivers for sadness. This in turn leaves fewer receivers for joy, therefore causing you to experience sadness more than joy. You will also have a tendency to view the world with a dim light, seeking the negative in order to feed your sadness receivers.

Philosophy of Uniform Social Standards

The Philosophy of Uniform Social Standards therefore states that in every choice, one should consider the fallout with "all" in mind. In other words, blow your choice out of proportion and see the consequences in macrovision. For example, know that if you tell a lie now, it will inhibit your ability to discern fact from fiction in all aspects of life.

In using the Philosophy of Uniform Social Standards daily, one will eventually discover the basic fundamentals to forgiving and humane behavior. They will be able to reverse depression, psychosis, complexes, fears, inhibitions, obsessions, compulsions, and generally unpack their baggage just by correcting a few seemingly simple behaviors.




My life took a complete 180 just by fixing one seemingly simple behavior. Hence the Theory and Philosophy of Uniform Social Standards.

Know Thyself

  • Mar. 1st, 2007 at 8:32 AM
Falcon Lost in Thought

You are your own worst enemy - because after all, who do you spend the most time with? The only time you will be tortured by an enemy is when you are with that enemy - and you are with yourself your entire life. It makes sense that you should know yourself best of all - but the subjective is always so much more allusive than the objective. It's harder for you to see a whole room in one glance when you're standing in the middle of it, but if you're on the outside looking in through the window, you'll see three of the four walls all in one shot.

There are two ways to avoid failure and making mistakes, and both of them begin with recognizing your weaknesses. Once you have recognized your weaknesses, once you know thyself, you can then begin to either 1. work to make that trait meet a certain standard  or 2. realize there's nothing you can really do about it, but remember that weakness and compensate for it through your other actions.

Don't just sit there and bitch about someone else's standards being too high - do something about it. If you don't care to meet their standards, there's no fault in that, go ahead and get yourself out of the situation where you have to meet their standards. If you do want to meet their standards, don't demand that they lower them - work to improve yourself so that you can meet them as they stand. There will be some cases where you are forced to meet certain standards, and depending on whether you work to meet them or don't, those standards will determine how successful you can be in life, unless you find a work-around.

When you know yourself, most especially your weaknesses, you can spend less time fixing your mistakes and failures, and more time working toward your success. If you take personal responsibility for your weaknesses, and take personal responsibility for improving upon them - then you only have yourself to blame for your success, and nobody can take that away from you, because you gave it to yourself.

Ever see a really successful person and think, "oh they are so lucky"? Give you a little secret, luck is not by chance - it's one-half opportunity and one-half ability to find, see, and utilize that opportunity. The second half is all on you, and wholly depends on your willingness to improve yourself to meet someone else's standards. If you do not know your weaknesses, and cannot improve or work around them to meet their standards, then you will have a much harder time taking advantage of opportunity and making the best of it.

In order for your life to improve, YOU have to improve. If you always play it safe, and never put yourself into situations bigger than yourself, then your life will not improve. Nobody is perfect, but everyone can be better.

Harmony

  • Feb. 28th, 2007 at 10:07 AM
candle
They say "don't rock the boat" - but I say, you gotta take a bath sometime. Harmony doesn't mean silent abstainance, and it is not an easy road to follow, by any stretch of the imagination.

The river may appear serene on the surface, but underneath is a current, and an entire eco-system with thousands of little communities working in harmony and balance. It has a definite direction, although not immediately apparent, the river is going somewhere, and it came from somewhere.

Does it tell you "I came from the mountains"? Does it tell you "I have a thousand dead fish"? If the river is without harmony, its poisons will infect the land, and nothing will grow properly - but if it is in harmony, it has no need to announce where it came from or what has died within it. The river simply does what it is meant to do, and takes proper care of itself and the life around it.

I have said it a thousand times - what can be found in nature is also within man, or at least should be. We are a part of nature, after all - a fact all too often forgotten.


In other words - realize that the world does not revolve around you, realize that the natural way of things is both temporary and for the good of all, nothing is out to hurt -you-, it's just seeking balance. Don't fight it, don't hate it - opt to understand it instead, if not help it. You were born to be a sacrifice for the betterment of all - stop trying to preserve your dignity, honor, or vision of your life as you see it. You will fail, because you -will- die. In the end all that matters is how you will be remembered. And the real question at that point is...

Were you a desert whose sole purpose was to prove the value of an oasis, because all you brought was death, desolation, and harshness - or were you a river whose sole purpose was to create life and help wash away and recycle the dead fish?

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